When Things Seem To Be Falling Apart…

More than once in my life have I chosen to begin again or perhaps it was the Universe giving me the opportunity to do so! I cannot say which time was the most challenging, but I do know each time I wanted to be comfortable in my own skin in spite of circumstances around me completely out of my control.

Long ago I made the choice to be a proverbial cliff diver. Perhaps it was because routine has always bored me and I came out of the womb willing to be a risk taker. As a diver of various proverbial cliffs I have never been sure I would even survive landing but I sure could not avoid taking deep dives.

I observe many people wanting to believe living day to day in safe routines will prevent their worlds from crashing in only to go into shock when life throws them unexpected situations.
I do relish change. That does not mean I do not initially freak when it starts. After all I am still a human being with human emotions!

The cause of our respective world falling apart may be a single event or multiple ones showing up simultaneously: a loss of someone or a pet close to us, career upheaval, medical and/or mental health challenges, relationship breakups, or a pandemic that brings the whole world to a halt.

Through each of the times it felt like my world was falling apart : because it was!…after my initial stomping my feet and doing some loud primal screaming with mega tears, I embraced the situation as a Re-set.
When any of us are willing to reflect back to past familiarity of situations, we might wake up to the fact during our entire lives we had been given a trail of breadcrumbs left by our pathway Creator of a better destiny. It is always the journey, never the destination . We have a choice to remain stuck in negative emotions or find our way through the cobwebs of change .

My experience in re-sets and new beginnings is sandwiched in some things:

Acknowledgement and allowing myself to feel the feelings instead of trying to run from them -Listening to the messages of my body for the body cannot lie -Eating nutritiously and exercisingMaking a daily gratitude list of what is currently present in my life -Journaling creatively as thoughts, fears, joys, inner Divine messages that come up, and- Watching life magically unfold as I choose to live my Re-set differently

I have no idea how my journey will end but I do know I trust the process and refuse to give up in my belief that the next time I jump off a new proverbial cliff my wings will open and I will fly onto a new adventure called Freedom of Spirit.


Pulling Myself Up By My Bootstraps

There have been two significant times of the year throughout my life that major shifts and changes have occurred that keep repeating in cycles of time. One has been a series of Decembers. The other has been between Mid March to Mid April. Decembers : December,1977 Graduated with Bachelor’s Degree. December,1984 Graduated with Master’s Degree. Several Decembers made big geographical moves. March/April: March-April 1964 Awakened from recovery of double pneumonia that almost took my life. April, 1991 Participated in a therapy group for childhood trauma and almost 90% of then friendships walked away from me. No one was mad or upset..just one of those big changes for me. April, 2017 had a major brain bleed and hematoma with no symptoms with an out of body experience at 3 weeks post brain surgery requiring no rehab stay because of miraculous healing!

I started driving across the USA to Chaco Canyon, New Mexico on a solo retreat around February-March in 2015, and continued to make this solo trip yearly with the most recent one ending in March , 2023. This experience continues to change my life for the better! This year I had just returned from New Mexico, and changes that occurred when a person I thought was close to me had stopped returning any correspondences with me without giving me a reason and a person I considered a mentor died from an ongoing medical condition.

I allowed the feelings to surface both from huge internal shifts in consciousness and from losses of people from my life. The past week I have been doing deep inner work and processing all these events. As I have done in my past I felt the twinges of uncomfortableness within yet knew change is such a great catalyst for stepping further into my personal power and pushing of an increased visionary evidence of why I am alive at this time in the world. I had to find those proverbial bootstraps and pull myself up once again. Believe me I reached out to several of those I call my tribe, but when I am needing to find my bootstraps there is no human to call on for help as I must do this inner journey myself. Yes, I have the support of those I trust but there are times I think we each must rely on Divine Source and our own inner strength that is always waiting in the depths of our soul.

The world has definitely changed in the past few years. I think we each have a choice. We can become an ostrich ,head in sand, and ignore what is being revealed right in front of our eyes. We can become angry and regurgitate repeatedly what we see as unjust and unfair. We can allow our fear to permeate all our decisions and choices and dive deeply into depression with some of us using addictions to cope. OR we can pull ourselves up by our bootstraps and embrace our inner strength that we were born with, becoming our own Ancestral Light that serves to radiate the Truth for ourselves as well as a beacon out of Darkness for others.

I am not content to sit back and let fear and anger rule my inner world. At one time I did not know a way out. Today my persistence and ongoing journey to becoming a better version of myself and a visionary leader in a confused world is the path I choose to take. Living in the moment, remembering I do not need to know how any of it will unfold continues to be the force that moves me forward. I am grateful I know I still have those bootstraps…sometimes they get hidden but they always are revealed to me if I do not give up before the absolute truth is revealed. This gives me hope, and I hope it offers you a ray of light if you find yourself in a darkened hallway.


Finally Letting Go Of Stale Things In Life

How often so many of us hold on to ideas, situations, people, and things we love. Over time we may have attached to different aspects that initially we claimed to love and adore. Our attachment often is sandwiched in emotional clinging and refusal to surrender and let go. I remember a poster I had in college that hung on the wall of my dorm room. It was a picture of a cat with big claw marks and the wording was “Everything I have ever let go of has claw marks on it”. As I reflect upon my past I can see how often life brought me jobs, people, ideas, things, etc. in order to offer inspirational opportunities that came to me for me to learn from and then move on. However, way too many times, I wanted to not let go, and as a result did not move forward with grace until I was able to wake up a bit in order to embrace many personal truths .

So many times I did not see the BIG PICTURE nor the forest for the trees. I wanted to cling madly to these things as if my life depended upon it. It took me a very long time, one filled often with pain due to my resistance in surrendering , for me to learn letting go is a major catalyst in my owning the gift of the opportunity of what showed up . Once I really wrapped my head around the personal truth that Divine Source or the Universe had presented me with this thing to learn and grow from I became very adept in releasing and surrendering. In my present life it has become much easier to let go without attaching emotions or my “claw marks” to most people, situations, and things. Maybe it became easier because I finally saw how much energy it took to hang on to things and people that no longer resonated with my core values or maybe it was because I finally began walking my talk of wanting to go with the flow in knowing letting go is a huge act of self love.

Accepting what is and is not in my highest good has taken lots of inner work . Several facets were revealed to me over time. Key were the following: forgiving myself for continuing to participate in situations that had long passed serving me that I kept being part of as well as a need to forgive others for their part (in my lessons!) when I perceived them to be the problem; willingness to accept the powerful experience from people-places-things by not holding onto any of it and allowing it to fuel my stepping forward into a better version of myself; allowing myself to feel and acknowledge the feelings attached to the experiences first, and then surrendering the players and props on the stage of the lesson presented ; grieving the loss of people and situations as part of the human experience when I finally let go; and practicing self care by having the things I have surrendered to be replaced with a deeper kind of self love. Practicing mindfulness meditation and becoming one with the natural world (nature, the great teacher) has brought forward so many of these gifts when and only when I set the intention to live my life differently than I had in the past.

When we refuse to let go of those things we know deep in our hearts that need to go, we will only keep recycling our pain and fear , staying stuck in the quicksand of being in the same place or attracting the same person with a different face. I have come to believe it is not loyalty and love to refuse to surrender a situation, idea, or person that is blocking me from the sunlight of the Spirit of my own happiness . I cannot grow and glow if I am staying attached to something I really have outgrown and learned from. Once I really get this..and it is a very long distance from my head to my heart , and I finally give up the fight and struggle, and claim “enough is enough”, surrender and not look back, I have given myself the proverbial key out of my self imposed cell of unhappiness . That key is called freedom and for me today freedom is a requirement to living a magical life. The exhale that came with this life of learning truly makes my heart sing, and I am excited to watch more amazing things to come!!!


When Receiving Is More Challenging Than Giving

Part of my journey in claiming my Authentic Self and Striving to be the best version of myself brought the awareness that I wanted equal relationships within all my connections. To go deeper it was necessary I looked at friendships, partnerships, business, and family relationships. I have come to the place in my life that I was no longer just a giver to others (which I had been for decades) but I also am very gracious and grateful to receive. I came to believe giving and receiving are different but also can carry dualistic thinking just as good-bad, open-closed, awake-asleep are. When I became aware of relationships, especially those with a long history, that were not equal between them and me, it was a struggle to stay in those situations. Believe me, I tried to give the other person the benefit of my doubts, and an opportunity to choose to be equal with me. I saw myself being equal with them and wanted that history between us to matter. Those people who put me on a different plateau than them continued and I just could not continue as I always had. I verbalized to the ones in the unbalanced relationships my truth, and drastic change did occur. I have no regrets for living in my truth once I am clear and awakened it becomes a core value that I am not comfortable going against and ignoring. I do believe once we awaken we cannot go back to sleep.

The fact I observe many people who believe it is better to give than receive has recently triggered in a positive way why receiving is harder than giving. I have the history that it was important to recognize the needs of others and wanted to always give of myself, my time, and my energy and even material things . This is not a bad way to live life, but when a person is mostly a giver and has issues receiving offers of help, material goods, kindness I think there may be an underlying reason.

As I reflect on my own journey changing from only being a giver I realized a few interesting things. When we are only giving we just may be demonstrating in our subconscious mind we are a generous, kind, loving person, and often that is to pat our ego on its back . I had to ask myself what was my intention in giving. Was it 100% to be there for another or were there times the shadow side of my personality was giving to show evidence of my goodness, to “fix” another’s brokenness, or to avoid looking and ignoring my own needs (self care put on back burner)? Receiving involves intimacy and vulnerability. When I ran from intimacy I could not accept compliments, help, or gifts from another. Being afraid of that deep place within of vulnerability also blocked me from the willingness to receive without having to give back to the giver. Big awarenesses to a person who had practiced life long years of co-dependency! I think the greatest part was discovering I carried shame from my early life and did not feel worthy and deserving to receive so I just kept giving….often at the point I was too drained to give any more but did anyway because I was stuck in my pattern of behavior!

Over the years I have learned to listen to my body having been convinced my body will never lie! When someone in my past offered me something whether it was an offer to help, to listen, a material object, or an opinion this was how I first became aware of how challenging it was to receive from another. I would get knots in my belly, shoulders would tighten up, or I would space out. It took me quite a while of being willing to receive as much as I was willing to give. My head would tell me I wanted to receive with ease, but my strong entrenched pattern of being Super Giver cancelled it out until I shifted. I honestly believe when I started taking risks to be vulnerable and to experience true intimacy with friends and others is when the heart knowledge of knowing giving and receiving are equal partners.

I am still a person who gives but the difference before I make the decision for someone else that I know what they need, I ask them. My former pattern was to believe I knew what was best for others, and I would bulldoze over them with my giving and doing for a whole multitude of people thinking it was an act of kindness. Today I am aware when I do for others especially when they can choose to do for themselves, I am taking away their right to ask for help from them. That old way was pretty arrogant and selfish, I believe.

When I could not or had difficulty receiving I did not feel worthy and I felt unsafe. What lay under that was I did not trust myself or anyone else, and jumped right into trying to control who, what, when , and in what settings I was willing to give. Furthermore, because I carried this big need to be in “control” when someone offered to give to me I felt they had control on some level over me. What finally helped me was when I began trusting in Divine Source. I had to do that before I could transfer trust to humans. Once I had a better handle on trusting and believing I was worthy of receiving as much as giving, I woke up to a great extent. As with other elements in my life over time, inner work has been the keystone out of my self imposed prison of fear and confusion. Still after years of doing much inner work vulnerability can feel scary, but my history is the evidence I can pull up and see how beneficial my willingness to do life a different way really is not only for myself but for every person I am in relationship with. I come back to my need to have relationships of equality, and every time it has to start with me. We really do teach people how to treat us, and choosing the road to becoming the best version of myself is a high priority. As a result I can receive with a wide open heart without feeling guilty or that I owe the giver something back, and I can give to another without carrying around a hidden motive. Practice really does make progress!


Willing To Follow The Path Of Least Resistance

I am constantly reminded when I pay attention and align with nature how my life flows easier. As I reflect on the harmony of how each season of the year teaches us I can apply that wondrous balance to my personal life. We humans often look at situations that we perceive to be uncomfortable and immediately want to reject what we see, wanting to change them into something more attractive to our minds. So often we view situations as not changing fast enough on our egoic time line or a challenge presenting itself that we do not like …and we immediately want to jump in with our big stick of the illusion of control by stirring it to change the experience to what we consider more appealing. Many of us look at things as “broken” and we jump into the “I must exert my will and fix this !”

What if we learned from nature instead as the Ancient Ones did? When a tree dies the balance of nature does not freak out. Instead it waits until the complete death of the tree occurs and with time a new seedling emerges from the ground, creating new growth replacing the old as nature creates room for the newly formed young to begin its new cycle. Almost every time we jump in with our “self will and control attempts for forced change” instead of creating something beautiful we create chaos and confusion. When we are willing to accept the current situation with ease and grace, we are more likely to experience the magic of surrendering to what is in the present moment and to embrace a new beginning formed from an old pattern of behavior. This, my dear reader, is being willing to follow the path of least resistance by going with the flow. I re-visit this stage of my spiritual and life development again and again. Fortunately, for me and the best version of myself that I allow to emerge ,there are more time than not that I flow and resist fighting, allowing an acceleration of advanced stages of progress. My mantra that helps me so much: PRACTICE MAKES PROGRESS.

Some of my thoughts on how to follow the path of least resistance that I share with you are: * Instead of telling and re-telling the story that life is hard and unfair, create and happily embrace the story that the Universe is happening for me and each experience shows me how magical and incredible my life really is! * Celebrate that and those things which I currently have in my present lifein gratitude acknowledgment of everything that is going right! * Remember that childlike joy of looking up at images of incredulous amazing shapes in the clouds of dragons, rabbits, castles, and more and visualize magical events, people, and journeys coming into your life. If you can dream it, you can see it , and manifest it into fruition.

Choosing to go with the flow, living in the freedom of the path of least resistance just might show you another way to live life that you had not previously considered. When things pop up that we may call a challenge or a crisis, looking first at the positives that are right in front of us; then, taking small steps to build a stronger foundation of flowing . I like to add short periods of stillness into my daily planner along with responsibilities that I have signed up for. Getting off that phone and computer and going out into the Natural World has never failed to thrust me into the flow of that wonderful Universe that always has my back. The more I resist struggling by practicing the art of the path of least resistance, the more I get to gather oodles of experiences I did not even see coming. I will see you on the Power of Flowing!

“My life is as magical as I allow it to be”

-Jennye, the JaguarWind Adventurer

The Ancient Teachings of Winter

Since childhood I have been connected to nature. However, I must confess there have been a few times I griped and moaned about Winter. I am making a public apology to the magnificent season of Winter now for that unawakened attitude! For many years I have been aligned in a deep connection with the ancient teachings of the Fire/Water/Earth/Wind elements and with all the seasonal changes Mother Earth has provided. Each moon cycle and all equinoxes/solstices as I continue to walk my talk in my journey have opened my heart to deeper lessons and opportunities . I know many enjoy nature but do not really connect to merging as an ally with her. I continue to honor with amazement the love and resilience of Nature to patiently wait for the multitudes of the Collective (who seem to ignore ancient teachings our ancestors lived by) to awaken to the Great Teacher that Nature is. Interesting how so many when forced to go into quietude and slowness when a virus pounced upon the world seem to forget how Nature began thriving without the populous running to and fro in search of proving achievement and chasing the money have returned to who they always were. Some occasionally go to nature for respite but many just continue running around like crazed rats in a cage either chasing the almighty dollar or needing to create constant distractions in the form of a need to participate in busy-ness. Then there are those who value what nature can teach us about each of us, and how our connection with Her can show a way out of a confused world. Perhaps the few of us who daily express our accolades for ancient wisdom that never died, only was forgotten and ignored , can help the Collective to once again remember what was placed on the back burner . The Earth will go on without us but will we choose to honor her by stopping our old, arrogant and sabotaging ways? I surely hope more will join consistently in applying Nature’s teachings .

In order for a tree to survive winter its roots have to be healthy. We also need healthy roots, a strong foundation in which we can be willing to surrender into a slower time, a time of reflecting. By reflecting we are not barren …instead we have an opportunity to be nourished from the inside. So many in our world think constant action equals growth and success. Winter’s gift is to slow into grounded stillness , that secret place where dreams of coming times can be cultivated and nurtured. Learning to adapt to changes are opportunities of reflective growth. Winter teaches we can catch up on slower activities that feed us: reading, sleeping longer, embracing the inner fire element of passions and protection. Words like snuggling, intimacy with others, fuzzy clothing, inner warmth can open us like no other season can.

When we choose to go outside in Winter we find a new appreciation for the Sun who shows up occasionally, not constantly. When we embrace a rare event we may learn to appreciate it more than when we expect it all the time. When scarcity of sun, warmth, light happens in our world we learn to express our gratitude of the experience.

Nature in winter offers a new perspective that we may not have even considered. As we go deeper within just like the bear in hibernation, we just may receive internal pleasures that never came from being constantly on the go, always needing to be involved in actions and flurries of activities. .Venturing into our darker caves of retrospection we can see the gift of stillness on our ideas, on our organs, on our thoughts, and even adapt to a calmer breath of peace.

Winter can bring our connections closer to us because of the co-creation of warmth within our respective hearts. Winter is not just another season. It is an opportunity to savor enjoyable idle and still hours of joy . So, enjoy that pot of simmering soup, that cup of hot chocolate swimming in melting marshmallows, and the dormancy of a more focused life as we catch more than a glimpse of what our priorities really are, and what really matters in our relationships, our passions, and our connections with the natural world.


Choosing To Celebrate Winter Solstice

I believe I came into this world with the knowledge of ancient ancestors in my DNA. When the world slowed to a crawl in 2020 while so many (were then and still even now, glued to computers in continuous zoom meetings) I was out in the world embracing nature. Somehow I knew that was the solution and gateway to the awakening re-set we were each being called to breathe into our cellular structure. Our ancestors and elders going back millenniums valued the teaching of nature and demonstrated it through various rituals and festivals. There is not a day that passes that I am not outside connecting with the wisest teacher available…glorious Nature. I am happy that I am not the only human being who knows this truth.

Winter Solstice is the shortest day and longest night of the year occurring in the Northern Hemisphere between December 20-23 and the shortest day of the year happens in June for the Southern Hemisphere. Scientifically and astronomically, the North Pole during winter of the Northern Hemisphere is tilted aways from the sun. Need more evidence this is not some new age , hippy dippy event? On the Winter Solstice stand outside at noon and observe your shadow. It will be the longest shadow you cast! Since the North Pole is tilted away from the sun the height of the arc is low so your shadow looks long! The sun is so low on the horizon that it appears to rise and set in exactly the same place. If you study Latin you will discover “solstice” means “sun stands still”.

Winter Solstice may have been celebrated since the early Stone Age. Many ancient civilizations created and built monuments to honor this Solstice. In Ireland around 3200 B.C. a tomb called Newgrange was constructed in which a tunnel faces the solstice sunrise into a chamber with a window bathing the chamber in glorious Solstice Light for 17 minutes. In Peru on the Solstice an ancient structure shows some of the giant monkey and lizard Nasca Lines touch the spot on the horizon where the sun sets. Similar structures can be seen all over the world aligning with the Winter Solstice.

If you get off your computer and phone and go outside this year, December 21,2022 you might spot Jupiter and Saturn coming together in the sky. Was this the “Christmas Star” written about in Christian belief?

For Solstice I decorate my hearth with pine boughs, holly and red berries, white and red candles , and pine cones . Adding pieces of nature into my inner world I write my intentions to be sent out to the Universe .

Even if we each may have forgotten the teachings of ancient cultures that wisdom lives within each of us. We value and experience the changing of the seasons . Some age old rituals to complete on this years Solstice that may resonate with your old soul are: Sit with pen and paper (writing it out as opposed to typing on computer opens brain pathways of creativity) and write each attitude, belief, and self defeating patterns of behavior you wish to release in order to be the best version of yourself .Look at any behaviors that are misaligned with your core values. Write them all down. Next reflect on any grudges, resentments either very present or buried deep within . Look especially at those things you have absolutely no control over. Ask before you write what would you have to do and who would you be different if you released these things? Once finished writing, create a Solstice affirming prayer or mantra , and place it on your Solstice Altar. On the night of the Solstice, take those written items to release and burn them by the light of a candle or lantern. Light radiates purification and truth. The Winter Solstice is a time of embracing the New Light. Now write at least 5 specific things you want to be radiated by the Solstice Energies. Leave these in a special place in your home to be opened in a year on the 2023 Solstice.

The Winter Solstice holds powerful opportunities to release and expand into a transformational new Consciousness not only for us as individuals but for the Collective of Humanity. Long ago I chose new traditions at this time of year to replace the old ones, and know in my heart all the Ancestors smile at this decision.


Are You Abandoning Yourself?

Are you practicing self abandonment ? How is that possible when you are always with you, taking yourself into all relationships, all situations? When we reject, ignore our needs and conscious desires, value time and energy we give others but do not value ourselves, criticize and judge ourselves with demeaning words and thoughts, and do not choose decisions and actions in our best and highest good, we are abandoning ourselves. We may intellectually comprehend what we want and need, yet choose to abandon and ignore those very things that would demonstrate self love and self compassion.

An example of how this looks. We arrive home after hours of doing a project or working long hours. Feeling tired and low energy, we just want to veg out on the couch and chill. We get a text or a phone call from our friend who wants to vent about her finances, her partnership, or her parent. Instead of giving yourself self time after the tremendously draining day you have experienced you immediately return the text or answer the phone call. After all your friend needs your great support and comfort. You don’t want to let her down so in spite of the fact you have no energy to give one more bit to another living being, yet you engage in the conversation with this person. Not only are you teaching said friend how to treat you…that her needs always come first, but you are also abandoning your own . Now , of course , being the kind person who wants to show all your willingness to listen and be there for those we care about is not a bad way to live our life. However, when this is a chronic and consistent pattern to make others and/or the job a priority , to put yourself and your needs on the back burner (thinking you will give yourself self care later after you attend to this friend), you return that text or call. You never want to let that person down . When we repeatedly do this behavior every time we are needed by another we are creating a pattern called people pleasing. We have taught others by our actions that no matter if we are sick, exhausted, or needing what we can only give to ourselves– self care and self love– we will put our needs on hold for our partner, our friends, our loved ones, or a work/ volunteer commitment .

Another scenario: we have been a social worker or other helping occupation for many years. We awaken to the truth that what really will bring us inner contentment and happiness is to follow our dream since early adulthood of being an artist. We share that with our partner or trusted friend. The response we receive is not supportive. or they do not even respond! Instead of pursuing our dream we stuff our desires deep down within often to make things comfortable and smooth sailing for our partner/friend. This behavior is not demonstrating that we value ourselves more than the opinion of another. We are practicing self abandonment in action.

Self abandonment shows up when our culture, society, or people close to us have certain expectations of us and our real needs and desires directly oppose those expectations, and we choose to follow the expectations of others, making a conscious choice to put our own internal desires on hold.

If you resonate with the following characteristics of self abandonment , perhaps this is your wake-up call to make different choices in order to value and empower yourself.

What self abandonment looks like in daily routines and life: * Hiding pieces of your authentic self: not sharing your true feelings as you give up your goals and interests that inspire you and not trusting your choices. *People pleasing: searching for validation of who you are, what you want to do in order to please and make another happy *Squashing, running from and burying feelings of not being comfortable in your own skin through denial, avoidance, distractions, workaholism and busy-ness or using mind altering substances * Not following your core values : Going along with others to keep things peaceful even when your values are being compromised * Not verbalizing to speak up for what you need: fear of setting and reinforcing needed boundaries as you allow others in any area of your life to take advantage of you * Refusing to respect and honor your own needs and desires: No consistent self care or even believing you do not deserve self care in the present moment *Perfectionism: Only feeling secure and worthy based on how much you accomplish and get done on a daily /weekly basis

Origin of Self Abandonment is usually from our family of origin or adult role models who emotionally, physically, or mentally were not present for us. The result we carried into adulthood showed up as feeling less than, unworthy, and undeserving of love and respect. This pattern , unless resolved, creates a subconscious one in which we choose friends, bosses, partners who are unsupportive and who do not really value us . Furthermore, we apply this pattern to ourselves! We are clueless of how to be our own best friend and cheerleader in life because we had no one present for us in our developmental stages as children when self esteem, self love, self value would have been molded for the positive creation of healthy, positive patterns.

The most important relationship you will ever have is the one you have with yourself! You can choose starting right now to stop abandoning yourself and begin creating a partnership of love with yourself. Here are some ideas:

Ask before acting these questions: Is what I am about to do an act of self love without my influence of guilt, obligation, or shameful fear? If there were no others in the world but me, would I still follow through on this decision and action? What do I need right now and am I willing to either ask for it or to give it to myself?

Give yourself permission to be your true , eccentric self expressing and acting with creativity in how you dress, what you do for fun, how you pursue your passions, and how you show affection and intimacy. Choose to give yourself compassion instead of critical judgment of what you label inadequate shortcomings. Honor failures equally with successes. Who lives in your head that demands you must be perfect?

Finally, listen to your body and notice your feelings when you feel challenged. Know that all humans at times suffer and have difficult stages in life. When we acknowledge this, we are more likely to connect with others who also are demonstrating they, too , are human. Above all else be your number One cheerleader and advocate. When we stand up for ourself we teach others to do the same for themselves! Aren’t we after all worth it!


A Partnership With Stillness

For much of my earlier life as soon as I arrived home I turned on the television. As soon as I got in the car I turned on the radio. I grew up in a household in which the news was blaring from tv during dinner. I adapted quickly ever since I emerged from my Mother’s dark womb into a world of noise: ambulances, traffic, public schools with loud lunches coming from everyone talking simultaneously, even talking to people while I took walks in the woods! Even while attending meetings I had challenges when periods of silence occurred among participants!

I was clueless that environmental noise could cause difficulty falling asleep, waking up too early, alteration of rapid eye movement, impacting ability to focus and concentrate on most activities, affecting the ability to listen to another’s communications, and causing mood swings, memory and attention levels! Research has shown even loud noises affect animals in their navigation in space, finding food, attracting mates, and avoiding predators!

I started learning to meditate around 40 years ago. I know initially it was challenging. For such a long time I lived in my head and being totally quiet, still, and exuding my Type A personality of believing I had to be actively busy to feel productive took a long time to change. Mindfulness took longer. Over time as I set the intention to live my life differently I made choices that surprised me! I began craving quietude instead of filling my life with noise. I eliminated all televisions from my home. I began getting in my car and not turning on any music or talk radio. I walked into my home and enjoyed the quietude.

Setting intentions of stillness had begun long before the world came to a crawl in 2020. I had an awakening that stemmed from deep within that nature was always trying to teach me the art and practice of listening. Not having to constantly be moving paired with noise was such a surprise to my system! At one time when I began partnering with stillness I wanted to be there all the time, like a Zen being sitting on a mountaintop in Tibet. This seems to be the way I choose change or change chooses me…I want this new way to be the only way I live so I fill every waking moment with the new manner…obsessing about I must do this more and often. Then slowly balance comes and I can choose to mix the new in with other aspects of my life. In my new found partnership I learned gradually stillness and quietude at times–music and other sounds at other times.

Recently I moved from living in a very isolated area of woods and wildlife and relocated to a small town living in a neighborhood. I thought I would have a hard time getting used to ambulance sirens, traffic , other noises, but surprisingly because I have partnered with stillness I am at peace with it all. Just like I would never just want to hang with a physical human partner all the time, I do not want to be in stillness all the time. I do start every morning with my Stillness as my chosen Partner and it grounds me , empowering me to fit into a world of peace. Over the past few years I have again been engaging with noise but too much of it is still a distraction. I pay attention to my body, my inner messages , and follow through when quietude is needed. I still do not own a tv, but I do listen to streaming on my computer. As with every other aspect for me moderation is the secret. I have not returned to my Type A personality. I can be talkative. I can be listening. I can be quiet. The interesting reveal was my truth that doing NOTHING is productive! Some days I just sit and live only in the present moment not needing to be doing…just enjoying being. I thought I had to be a busyaholic even in play. My Stillness Partnership opened a new world I did not know even existed: and, the year the world came to a screeching halt of slowness accentuated this amazing way to live. Still a student in learning of what does and does not resonate, knowing I will always relish change, and trying things out before I dismiss them with the old way of thinking it will not work for me, I am most every day comfortable in my own skin.


That Which We Experience Happens For Us!

For much of my life I wanted to find validation and confirmation that I was accepted for who I was. It is not so much I wanted to conform to be a duplication of others because I did not feel this way. I wanted to be my quirky self and know that personality I exuded to the world was not broken, not defective, not needing fixed. My search for this went across many adventures in this thing I call life. I joined groups of who I thought were like minded until I finally discovered what I really needed were the like hearted! I tried mind altering substances, various Spiritual Practices, read tons of self improvement books, listened to motivational speakers, traveled to sacred places, and still searched for that validation that I was ok. I participated in group after group, went to sweat lodges and consulted authentic shamans. I was a rebel, a fighter of what seemed to be injustices happening to me!

I ,at one time, believed the collective was right…that things happened TO not FOR us until I discovered the secret hidden away in a locked treasure chest of truth. I held this belief UNTIL I became aligned with this fact: Life situations happen FOR us not TO us!

When I was a reactor as opposed to a responder, those things I called challenges that presented themselves were in my skewed perception happening “to” me. Then when I shifted my conscious understanding that all is an opportunity , (and it is all an opportunity) I began to see the benefit of responding with gratitude instead of resisting and fighting with reactions. There have been many times I kept holding on with claw marks attached to a variety of people, situations, attitudes, soap boxes to those that maybe once served me but in the present are only blocking me. It took me a while to wake up to see what was true: the problem was that person I saw staring back in the mirror: ME and my rigid, unmoving ideas!

How do we know the Universe and/or Source is showing us we would benefit by letting go, surrendering? It is almost always those things that are not working and flowing…those things we keep trying to force to work out mustering the greatest amount of the false illusion of control we push and ram our proverbial “my way or the highway” to get them and it to be the way we demand it. We may even say to ourselves, but I must find a way to make this work! In those times I am willing to wager we think the Universe is happening “to” us.

On the other side of this spectrum when the challenge or deep desires we insist on achieving is met by us living in the present moment, exhaling with a loud sigh, and embracing the fact this is happening “FOR” us, we might finally accept and see how amazingly powerful letting go of our old way of doing life , and listening to the messages presented by the Natural World of a different way to approach anything and anyone can offer freedom. Trust me, freedom is one of my greatest core values.

Where I am in my current life is doing my happy dance (most of the time ) knowing life is magical and mystical, always working with me , not against me. Once I stop being so adamantly stubborn to keep doing what I have always done resulting in getting what I have always gotten and looking back on every situation I have been fortunate to live through, I see without a doubt, it happened FOR me, and as a result I am comfortable in my own skin and a conscious responder. Whew…that exhale felt so good!!!


Lessons Of Autumn

As long as I can remember Autumn has been my favorite season. Memories of the excitement of leaves turning brilliant oranges, golden brown, and reds as the weather where I grew up on the East Coast of America began cooling. A time for pulling out fall jackets and sweaters, bon fires, and football games were rituals.

The ancient cultures embraced the change of seasons by observing and listening to the messages of each . In today’s world of hustling and bustling to prove our productivity and chasing the almighty dollar as a marker of personal success many have forgotten the teachings of what our ancestors knew . The Natural World sits patiently still offering master lessons to those who honor what Nature freely is willing to teach us.

Autumn offers a time of surrendering following a joyful busy summer and gathering of an abundant harvest of gratitude for all the passions the element of Fire has presented . As we move deeper into the Earth element of Autumn we feel the emotions of a short cycle of the green growth of leaves transforming into a vibrant array of colors then falling onto sacred ground as brown remnants of what was. We may begin feeling our internal surrendering of what has passed either in honoring the cycle of letting go of pieces no longer needed in our respective lives or resist the changes that are inevitable as we try desperately to hang on to old attitudes, relationships that have long past the time of needing to be severed and our skewed misperceptions of who we and others truly are. Choices always are for our denial or taking.

When we are willing to honestly use this season to inventory and assess our imbalances holding us back from moving forward so we can become a better version of ourselves, we will remember why we love Autumn so much! The ways of our ancestors do live in our blood, in our DNA. Learning to incorporate the opportunity of Autumn’s blessing of surrendering and re-assessing our intentions in the non duality of giving and receiving may bring up a need to grieve and a need to clear out stale aspects of our inner world. We may ask consciously in our quiet reflections what is it we need to honor in ourselves in our current evolution and where are we demonstrating an imbalance . Willingness to check in with our true selves before the darker days of winter coming will match the gift of Autumn in Nature showing us we can sit in integrity without having to plant new seeds or harvest new crops.

Autumn ..my favorite season ,offers each of us a gift to let go, to grieve any losses, and to flow with the changes without a need to control any outcomes or need to know how the future will look. Truly this transformational season is a special blessing.


What If You Knew You Could Live An Amazing Life ?

I spent much energy and thought on how my life could be better. At some points I thought it would be better if I had more of this or that. Then at other times I was sure if I had less ..less stuff, less responsibilities, less thinking, less time to get it all done in what was left of my life. When I became part of the world changing due to a repetition of something the past world before my time had already experienced , and (was yet again being given another opportunity to become willing to do a re-set) I thought just maybe I needed to be doing my life differently. I kept hearing in my mind: STOP trying to figure it out. STOP judging the outcome. STOP needing to know how it or anyone will turn out, act, cope, or look while experiencing this game called life.

When businesses closed and the world slowed to a crawl I had a choice as did everyone…slip into complete anxiety and fear or glide into stillness and reflection. I did the former first but only for a little while. Stillness in nature invited me to join Her on a new adventure. Being in quietude for hours and days at a time with Nature was quite different. I want you to Know that I had been meditating for a few decades, hanging out in woods and forests, went on personal retreats yearly, and had journaled since I was 7 years old. This, though was different. I asked myself what if this re-set was just about my discovering I could live an amazing life without needing a book or the rules and steps to do so? Where did that idea come from anyway and what did it matter in the first place?

One solution which has been present in my life as long I can remember is what I call probing. I probe by asking myself questions. The question that helps me the most is this one: What brings me the most joy and what am I passionate about? Easy, peasy: It is creativity. When I am not being creative I feel like one of the un-dead zombies. Way back in the sixties people talked about creative visualization. I remembered if I could create in my mind and picture myself actually bringing to life situations using my imagination, I always felt better. I did this as a kid lying in the grass on my back talking to clouds and trees, creating little beings or big ones out of shadows. I today call this magic. Creativity opens our minds, solves problems, and puts us right in the center of living in the present moment!

My next probe came out of magical creativity. I asked myself what if there were no limits to what I could create, and furthermore, what if I began creating this magical life without boundaries and did not care who judged me for doing it? One of the fears I had carried around since childhood was a fear that people judged me because they did not approve of not only my magical creations but did not approve of my choices and basically did not approve of who I was! Once I really got this in a midnight light bulb moment, I began surrendering …I surrendered in bits and pieces the need to know what people were going to think about me (and of course most kept that judgment to themselves and perhaps I would not have even known how I was being judged if it had not been for the fact that my creativity was sandwiched in between my strong intuition !) My intuition blasted out to me who the judgers were. For a while this brought up my being uncomfortable in my own skin. I did not want to believe The Who that was shown to me. You see, though, my love and passion for creativity by now had bled into every area of my life, and the need to be creative became stronger than allowing those judging me based on their unresolved inner self conflicts which were being projected onto me! I was now seeing the inequality of different relationships . It was not that I was mad or even disappointed with those I had tolerated . I was just over it. I walked away from many. I knew I could create equal areas in all my life..not just in a few areas! Then the big news awakened me and made my heart sing loudly upon the realization. Knowing what I loved (creative magic) had led me down a pathway I never knew was possible. New partnerships and friendships emerged.

Magic happens to those who believe in it. Way back when I was only using my imagination to create beings from shadows I was being led to embrace a new way of living, a new way of being. When we set the intention (and intention I believe is 99.9% of manifestations) to live an amazing life, and we focus on that repeatedly( even in spite of fears swirling around in our bellies) the Universe will match us, and our internal intentions become external truths.

I ask you now Do you want to live an amazing life? What makes your heart sing and are you willing to do that thing 24/7 ? Try it for one week and see what happens. What do you have to lose?


The Opportunity For Balance

The Northern Hemisphere on September 22, 2022 welcomes the Autumn Equinox, a time in which day and night are equal in length. Since ancient times it has been celebrated as a powerful energetic and transitional time landing between the time of the seasonal periods of Light and the Darker aspects we experience.

Autumn Equinox invites us each to reflect on our internal shiftings from our thoughts, activities, and practices of the blazing heat of Summer into the changing quieter transition of our callings. Traditionally, Fall has been the time of school beginning after a busy and eventful break of active play and vacationing. Perhaps this Equinox is tapping your shoulders with an invitation to engage in intellectual, spiritual, and mental learning.

It is a time to check in with our inner scales to determine how our mind, body, and spirit is balanced and aligned with our core values and needs. We may desire to ask each element within what will bring our sacred feminine-sacred masculine sides into the balanced union of nurturing, creative endeavors, actions, and self discipline.

Are you being summoned to start new projects or insert a depth of more focus on old ones? Is it a time to deepen current commitments or to walk through the portal of innovative ones? The Autumn Equinox this year carries with her energies of a greater opportunity to really listen to our heart and body. The possibilities for spiritual, emotional, physical, and mental balance await us each during this transitional gateway.

Take the time to walk outside observing the changes that occur within the changing seasons. Reflect on the teaching that is being offered to you by the Master Teacher, Mother Nature, as the Ancients did. As we turn more inwardly with the intention to really listen we will be rewarded with the manifestation of hidden treasures awaiting us.


Being A Transparent and Authentic Friend

There was the me who once upon a time felt a need to hide certain aspects of who I really was. I believe growing up in a world and a household of mixed messages gave me indirect ideas that being vulnerable was not safe. Then there was that issue with trust I carried with me into most areas of my life. I tried to exude the personality that I was this together person even though deep inside my insecurities were holding my foundation in a sea of quicksand! It did not help that one of my parents told me repeatedly it was important to “look good” to the outside world. I imagine many of us have lived with a similar internal conflict.

Transparency implies openness, accountability, and intentional honesty. Most relationships, be it romantic partnerships or friendships, lacking transparency, crumble over time because one within the friendship/partnership is either incapable or refusing to share important facts and information. It is not that the other is intentionally lying to the other…they have just withheld truth.

I remember the day I made the decision to become transparent and authentic . Once the decision was made I did not need to wait to be asked about specific things in my friendships. I knew with all my heart and soul it was important to reveal my thoughts, my challenges, even my fears.

There have been friendships in my history I have tried to maintain in which the other person has not been transparent, and I struggled with them, knowing they were not equal ones. I suppose I could have continued in such relationships. However, trust, accountability, and honesty are keystones for me in any relationship I choose to maintain in my present evolution of being the best version of myself. My deal breakers are proportionally aligned with my core values. When I have revealed what is really inside of me, aspects of my life with complete vulnerability and the other person judges me or immediately changes the subject without responding or shifts the conversation to something about something else without acknowledging what I just honestly and with vulnerability shared it is a red flag for me. It is not even about them agreeing or disagreeing with me. It is about evidence of my being heard.

In the new world we are now living in, it may be helpful to assess if we as individuals are content with the health of each of our friendships , if each is authentic and equal, if our friendships are with those we can truly trust and count on to be honest and loyal, and are we confident of having no fears or apprehensions of being judged or criticized (verbally or non-verbally).

My bottom line is when I am transparent and authentic, I am showing up as the true being I am. Furthermore, I desire and will honor myself by being in relationships with those who embrace and welcome me as I am. Those who think I need to follow their set of rules or beliefs are welcome to co-exist in our world, but I am not so sure I want to maintain a friendship or partnership with them.



It is a fact we need each other. Psychologists have long researched and told us that love and belonging are crucial for all human beings. Even those who consider themselves loners need to belong because we are each social creatures. When we become disconnected from our people, our tribe, we suffer long term consequences. Our internal yearning craves the connection of belonging but even stronger is the innate need to belong to ourselves.

Our search for belonging in the journey to be valued and accepted may have taken us down a road in which our authentic self has been compromised. When we betray our very essence by agreeing to hide all or parts of who we really are in any relationship or chosen group of others, we will suffer deeply. We may have discovered that just joining with others is not enough. When we fear people will judge us or not even understand who we really are, there may be choices and decisions we make to give our loyalties to others while we remain disloyal to ourselves.

If we finally have that radiant light bulb moment of inner knowing which will require vulnerable truth and courage that being our authentic self sandwiched within is the highest level of self love and self acceptance ,we will finally be free to be part of a tribe without sacrificing our beautiful self! We will no longer hold back all or any aspects of who we are. We will ultimately grant ourselves the permission we have long denied to live as the best version of ourselves. Once we crawl or jump out of our chamber of hiding from all, even from humanity, we can never return to believing in order to be accepted and belong we must sacrifice ourselves. We will belong and stop suffering. Self belonging still will require inner work and self check-ins to align with our real self. Today as a result of my light bulb moments, I choose to be only my true self, and I know I am enough wherever I go.


Opening The Portal Of Hope

Experiencing abundance is as simple as opening our eyes and ears to the awareness of that which has been generously sprinkled upon each of us every day. We are not going to think our way into the opportunities awaiting us behind each blocked door our beliefs of impossibilities created by fears, limitations, lack, and low expectations prevent us from experiencing.

Often it is our recycling of deep subconscious thoughts that because sometime in our past someone inflicted proverbial chains of doubt and patterns of self sabotage that we believe years after the claim we cannot locate our own bootstraps needed to lift ourselves out of the swamp of shame. We may choose to remain locked in hopeless despair instead of choosing to stand up and walking out a swinging door that our negative ideas convinced us was locked.

We may get some perverse pleasure we call evidence in aligning with what “THEY” did to us which continues to prevent us from living our best life. The collective “they” could be parents, caregivers, lovers who rejected us, the government, etc. Pick your “they” that still after the experience long ago has ended .. you may still be giving free admission to have power over you.

An alternative path could be to open our vision fully at the multitudes of trees, forests, winged ones, creeping crawlers, finned and water animals thriving in the Natural World . This view of a world of diverse and incredible possibilities can show us all the Divine has created for our and their co-existence . Nature is our greatest teacher!! Are we yet ready to listen?
When we stop our self destructive and self pitying perceptions we just might awaken to the possibility of abundance to view with gratitude all that the Divine has anointed upon our daily lives . Only then is it possible to see that the thoughts we locked in our little restrictive boxes of fear and inactive solutions can we see alignment with a Divine Power is bigger than any of all those little boxes we assigned to various wishful thinking of relationships and areas we have been dragging around in a sack of hopeless disappointment.
When we choose to stop trying to run our show because we so want to be in control, and choose to align with this Divine Power, we just may see a very different life. If still not convinced, you may answer this question: How is that working for you to do it your way?

Without risks the possible remains impossible. Stepping out of our comfort zone when we are willing to do the same or similar situations differently is the key to walking out a locked door that was never locked in the first place! Freedom of spirit only comes when we allow our skewed misperceptions to melt in the radiance of changing our thoughts. Simple….But how we love to complicate our lives.


Are You The Cause Or The Effect?

Reflecting on the many times that life situations have not gone my way with my being uncomfortable in my own skin, it has always been of value to ask myself: What was the CAUSE?

Often we may discover it was our reaction to the world outside of us trapping us in a cobweb of a recycling vortex of negative thoughts . This is not a pretty place to allow ourselves to be stuck!
When we stop the whirlwind of internal struggling by choosing to stop telling and re-telling a false story created by picking up that old finger of blame laced with illusions someone is making us a victim we amazingly see how the cause can be transformed by our positive actions moving us into claiming the effect we desire.

Our story which is usually not even true has a basis in assumptions and past unresolved issues we have hidden in a dark crypt of our subconscious mind. So often the current reaction has nothing to do with the event or person we are projecting our story onto but actually is an old experience of pain we are still dragging behind us into selected , if not into all, relationships!

Switching to using the famous ancient Hermetic Principle as above, so below, we can return to right relationships with our inner thought-propelled actions extending from our home to the world and every space in between. This principle of absolute truth dealing with action- reaction and cause- effect can assist us in remembering every thought , spoken/ written word, and action affects each and every relationship we have. Our choice in changing to loving thoughts and constructive self actions immediately has the ability to move us above the fearful, anxious problem to a place of above: inner peace. The “ below” is a projection of not having what we demand with levels of unworthiness, rejection, and fear while the newly understood creation of the “ above” produces amazing awareness of the internal links to the calm serenity we have been seeking. Our simple actions provide concrete evidence this ancient law of as above, so below is true!

Therefore, you may want to ask yourself Am I the cause or am I the effect? Choices, my dear reader, can be held tighter than an anchor’s knot or released and changed as easily as the spontaneity of your first kiss.


Resilience Is Your SuperPower

We came from ancestors who survived Tyrannosaurus Rex viewing people as their entree and those who walked before us who faced earth changes and near annihilation . Our DNA carries Survivor-Resilience. Repeatedly, I reflect on past cultures and what we have forgotten. Thriving in times of unexpected chaos can awaken within each of us solutions of magnitude . We can choose to be the Wayshowers of Light or the Doomsday Criers of Despair. How we can muster and gather our inner strength into an impervious Ball of New Vision is exactly what resilience offers us each an opportunity to embrace!

Resilience is the ability to adapt to challenging events and experiences of life situations even when knocked down a few notches and come back just as strong or even stronger than before. In addition, it is the adaptation to bounce back when things do not go as we had preconceived. Looking at my own life once I claimed Resilience as one of my SuperPowers, I looked at difficult circumstances as challenges to overcome, not as anything that was able to paralyze me into a frozen state of fear. My ownership of resilience became wrapped in a visionary commitment of my intentions in those causes important to me, in nurturing relationships/friendships I desire to maintain, and in acknowledging/adhering to my personal core values.

It is a fact that part of life is going to include making mistakes, being unsuccessful in certain aspects we hope to achieve, and even seeing certain situations and relationships come to a brutal end. Instead of allowing these times to devastate us to the point we give up and try to shelter ourselves from taking more risks, we can be determined to make Resilience one of our Superpowers by seeking and making concrete efforts to go after our hopes and dreams. Wrapping our failures and mistakes around our shoulders as learned opportunities , we really can bounce back stronger than the Energizer Rabbit , and move forward to things we never even imagined we could successfully see manifesting into fruition!

Here are some key ways to creating Resilience:

*Self care by getting effective sleep nightly, incorporating exercise you enjoy daily (gym, walking, swimming, tai chi, etc.), and using relaxation tools such as breath work and mindful and walking meditations.

*Listen consistently to the thoughts you have. When negative ones show up, replace them with positive ones. Ask the question: Is that really true? Who told me that???

*Respond with balanced calmness as opposed to reacting with anxious panic when life throws us a monkey wrench we did not see coming. I am a big fan of sticky notes that I put all over the place reminding me of choices I can make that are helpful not hurtful to my mind, body, and spirit.

*Find and nurture strong connections with others. When we find those we have are no longer working for our Highest and Best good walk away with kindness and compassion. Authentic relationships will feed our resilience and confidence in ourselves that we then can be a walking example for others to follow. When we have a network of trustworthy and supportive people we are never alone, and can call on them for support and help.

*Recognize and acknowledge our struggles and challenges are valid. We do not want to deny their stress on our wellbeing .

*Inventory and claim the strengths you already have. This is not arrogant. It will help us to call on our own abilities when the unexpected occurs.

*Give yourself permission to take a break from being so serious and a workaholic (even in play). Know what gives you pleasure and incorporate it into your calendar!

Resilience IS a superpower! Use it to your advantage and you might even discover you had magical wings attached to your back all along that will help you soar through challenges and life changes.


Embracing The Exhale

In my quest of the current journey of my life to uncover ancient wisdom and ideas to remain calm and return to that sacred space of being comfortable within my own skin multitudes of solutions appear…usually in my Dreamtime. There was a long period of time these solutions only came in those times of meditation . I cannot tell you when this awareness changed for I have been writing about my night dreams for eons. I have also been practicing mindfulness meditation for 36 years. When it happened for me I believe an internal shift made itself known to my conscious mind and I was pleasantly surprised to welcome that almost mystical place that probably has always been available ..that amazing place existing between my dreamtime space and my meditations.

Have you ever noticed , especially since the world changed, that you could be feeling fantastic, happy and carefree when suddenly you are surrounded by a sudden episode of anxiety and highly charged emotions? Sometimes mine comes on when I am watching or listening to a speaker from their podium (especially those who claim to be healers or spiritual leaders) . I am referring to the negative aura exuding from some speakers or writers whose energy seems to overtake not only myself but the whole audience! Being a life long empath, I pick up on how others around me are being affected. Then there are those times this happens when I am triggered by hearing of suffering in the world caused by despairing events of viruses, starving cultures, greed, and uncaring political people. When this experience occurs I feel this inner tension start building in my belly right at my diaphragm and it moves up my spine into my heart. Overwhelm takes over and my feet feel they are immobilized as if in quicksand.

Having lived through the revolutionary sixties when we demanded social change and often aggressive violence tried to push us back into our holes of non resistance , that old fear can pop out. For the longest time I did not know how to handle those times of anxiety and confusion UNTIL my journeys to the otherworlds and other dimensions started appearing in the dreamtime place.

I am blessed to be a visionary dreamer and most of the time I can understand the messages presented, and see that even my perceived nightmares hold solutions in my waking hours! If I do not understand I have a couple of highly intuitive people in my world I can call on for an interpretation.

One of my reoccurring messages has been to embrace the exhale. Now many will say it is best to also embrace the inhale , but I have found by doing a modified version of the Tong Len practice by visualizing and holding all those intense emotions in a box I create in my mind then EXHALE with a huge wind noise and my audible primal scream , blowing them out into a huge ceremonial fire I imagine ,seeing they are consumed by the fire, and transformed into self love and Light! Embracing the Exhale solutions is beyond incredible. There are many other examples and techniques of embracing the exhale that have come to me.

The exhale is the beyond -surrender. Knowing I have a choice to surrender by embracing my exhale has pushed me out of so many internal conflicts. I use it with people who try to focus their ill will and negative opinions on me, with my questions of why the world has become like it has , with conflicts of my deepest connections I have with others, and when I read angry, resentful statements spoken by both strangers and known others.

Once I embrace the exhale, I then can return to my wonderful calmness and my breathing is sandwiched in my peace. I once again enter that self loving place of being a better version of myself.

I can hardly wait to go to sleep every night to get the pleasure of hearing yet another idea that my great intelligent mind never dreamed of and hear the ancient and unworldly beings download me with something new!


Compromise Or Walk Away?

Have you ever noticed in some areas of your life: romance, work, or friendship it is like a plot in a movie entitled Same Relationship With A Different Face? Have you thought about the possibility that just maybe you attempted to resolve an issue with someone and you questioned if you were the one over compromising and giving in ? I have been reflecting on the value of compromising in several relationships over the past little while.

I am not an advocate of living in the past. However, sometimes there is merit in reviewing decisions made and actions taken. It helps me to come to terms with my recycled patterns of behaviors. Patterns that are repeated of which I have observed in myself seem to be replays of uncomfortable responses to negative experiences. Sometimes I have asked myself have I been compromising too much and the other person has not compromised at all! Because I have looked at how I have shifted from an aggressive doormat of my past to a person with no problem stating calmly how I feel in any situation, I have formulated some cardinal points regarding compromises applicable in almost all situations.

  1. When my stated opinions and thoughts are ignored in conversation after conversation this feels like a red flag of disrespect . I am referring to when voicing my thoughts, aspects of my life and the other person never responds, but just jumps to another topic repeatedly. Clearly there is no give and take going on here.
  2. When I know I have changed since the initiation of the relationship, especially in verbal and behavioral exchanges with the other person, and they have not changed it may be time to walk away. Compromising is no longer an option.
  3. When I have repeatedly requested the other to stop doing a specific behavior, and they keep doing the same behavior and you remind them , and their response is saying they have trouble remembering your request, perhaps this is a deal breaker.
  4. If I have not been transparent about my wants/needs why would the other not be offering them? Once I realize where I was not communicating clearly and the other feels I am asking for too much, I may be able to compromise by rethinking what I am asking of them.
  5. I can stop trying to be right. I accomplish this by listening to the other person’s opinion and belief. Listening without judgment is a great tool of compromising.
  6. Asking inwardly is it crucial to myself to stand my ground on a certain topic or could I be willing to reflect on my expectations toward the other? If I say I am willing to compromise, and then refuse to do so, I am only showing the other I make false statements of a resolution. This is not integrity within any relationship.

In future connections with compromising I can maintain an open mind, be an active listener without judgement, and be willing to modify my expectations. However, when compromising is no longer building a bridge of a relationship of give and take, perhaps it is time to consider the value of the relationship, which may lead to walking away from it.


Key to Inner Peace: Detachment

Have you ever reflected upon attachments you hold to a person or a specific outcome of a situation? I have looked at this often in my life, and have reached repeatedly the same AHA conclusions. My unhealthy attachments are always rooted in fear, and that shadow feature I love to hate: a desire to control. I think with some people it is also an inner need to hang on and leave claw marks on the familiar. Fear, you may ask? The human being ‘s fear of afraid to lose what we have placed deep ownership upon or fear we will never get what we demand is rightfully ours to manifest into fruition.

Over the years I have made efforts to become a better version of myself, I have become vulnerable and in almost all relationships in most areas have stated what I observe in others. I will be the first to profess I am not the most diplomatic on the planet, but I am one who holds nothing back, who tells it as I see it, and who is unafraid to tell another what I like about them and what is not working for me. Recently someone who has known me for many years told me I can come across as being unkind. That perception is her assessment of my stating what I observed in her. My inner thoughts on that with anyone are two-fold. I believe our world has become filled with a collective of over sensitive people who prefer to remain in what they believe is a safe rabbit hole…who prefer not to take a deeper dive into potential authenticity sandwiched in surrendering old ideas most likely that live in the subconscious . I suspect these ideas were hammered into their belief systems by role models of authority at a young age. That was not their fault, but I also believe as functional adults we have the responsibility to find solutions to walk our talk in the present. Secondly, if we allow others to be who they are without wanting to change each other’s behaviors, perhaps we are equally able to allow ourselves to be who we really are without hidden motives and agendas..to release the false faces we have been demonstrating since childhood, and heaven forbid, grow up!

I wholeheartedly concede attachments play a crucial role in connections with bonds we have with friends, partners, family, and co-workers. Without attachments we would always be seeking out other people when the first symptoms of a disagreement occur. With the initial emotional attachments we have with others, we may feel safe and secure. Of course, we humans have wants and needs. Otherwise why would we not shy away from relationships? If we can be gut level honest with ourselves we might admit we don’t feel bonds, even love with another because of what the person can give or do for us. We feel unconditional love for another because of who the other is.

Attachment , the unhealthy type, can be born when we believe another can give us something we do not think we have within ourself. If we have attached to any relationship carrying the belief this person has something we think we do not have ,a conflict will probably begin when the other person is not fulfilling some of our unspoken needs. This conflict can grow because often a need for a person to fulfill unreasonable expectations for us continues to create a visible abyss between us. This abyss , if not communicated and addressed can become a gaping canyon.

Learning to detach from our dependence on another , and understanding how to meet our own needs ourself is key to creating better relationships with all kinds of people. Acceptance of each other as we are is important. However , if there are areas and subjects that are always requiring us to steer away from another due to lack of trust, invalidation, and disrespect, perhaps it is time to consider how much we really value the relationship. Ask ourself if it is a healthy attachment clothed in reciprocal respect or is it a one-sided aspect that you never even saw coming….until the day you saw a bit more honest truth can be a catalyst to ones own growth. It may be painful to become aware the other person has not changed at all…it is just you did not want to see what was shown to you by them and by your participation , perhaps from the beginning.


Unspoken Rules

I find human behavior …and my own..so intriguing. If I invite you to play a new board game and do not tell you how it is played, and we start the game with one of us not understanding the rules, I guarantee one of us will be trying to figure it out and one or both of us will be frustrated..maybe even angry . Maybe the one who was not made privy to the rules will not care that they do not know how to play, and will just make up the rules as they proceed with the game. Maybe the one who did not offer an explanation of how the game is played will get so frustrated that they just walk away , assuming the other is stupid. Maybe the one who did not know the rules will speak up and ask pertinent questions enabling them to understand what is it the other wants to happen. Maybe the one with the information of the game will resent the other for not figuring out what they believe anyone should know. Human beings sure are interesting, aren’t we?

Of course we have social norms that are unspoken, unwritten rules such as not taking or asking for the last piece of pie, leaving something better than when you found it, being kind and courteous to people working in a service position, not whispering to someone when you are in presence of a group of others, replacing toilet tissue if you used the last ply, using the rule of letting people get off the subway/public transit before you get on, never apologizing with an excuse (I am sorry, BUT….), etc. So many social rules are assumed we all are aware of instead of them being stated or written.

Then there are unspoken rules in interpersonal relationships between friends , family, and partners such as avoiding letting go of old resolved conflicts from the past by not bringing it up again, never using the other’s weakness or flaws against them, keeping things private that have been spoken in confidence to avoid the other feeling betrayed, letting them know you are on their side, giving each other and yourself personal space with alone time, avoiding your own insecurities by allowing time for them to be with their friends without you, and by all means being yourself authentically: it is crucial you do not pretend you like everything they think or do, and especially do not verbalize you do! My all time favorite : drop the desire to play the blame game to try to make them wrong so you can sanctimoniously feel right!

Setting ground rules in any relationship is important. Since there is not a rulebook, it is important to express what YOU FEEL at the onset of a relationship. If you have not done this, when things start to get hairy it is a very good idea to re-state your wants/needs and voice your deal breakers. When we do not start a relationship of any kind with boundaries and our “rules” we will experience the relationship crumbling, and we will be faced with a choice to decide how much value the relationship holds for us..and if we want to sit down in discussion with the other or not.

What I have personally observed in inefficient unspoken rules within relationships are clearly poor communications where the other person “assumes” their partner or friend knows what is expected when it has never been discussed; and, passive-aggressive , power struggles result. Not always , but usually the case exists that the reason deal breakers have not been discussed is because no talk or no communication rules exist; and/or one of the involved has allowed the unacceptable behaviors to continue without opening their mouth to say it is unacceptable or uncomfortable. Healthy disagreements within any relationship are part of a growing relationship. When a resolution cannot be reached, perhaps it is time to walk away into the sunset without guilt or remorse even if a long history between you has been your experience. Even with that choice, would you use one of your unspoken rules and just walk away or would you voice what you have decided to do?


Do You Go Out Of Your Way To Be The Nice One?

I am relatively sure I came into this world as a rebel, asking direct questions to every person who crossed my path in order to discover what was not being spoken. Part of that motive was because from birth I have been very intuitive to the point I literally see the energies of words spoken, and always knew when a person was holding back some information and/ or knew what was spoken did not exactly align with a person’s thoughts or body language. I thought either the person was being dishonest or they thought it was not safe to divulge their true thoughts with me. I cannot remember a time , even when I was four years old, that I did not think it was my right to uncover the person’s hidden motives. I have never been great at being diplomatic when I wanted answers!

What I later came to understand is those who practice conflict avoidance really are demonstrating deep rooted people pleasing behaviors grounded in a lifetime of fear of upsetting another! People who go to great lengths to keep the peace at all costs probably have baseless expectations of the other person reacting negatively toward them. In other words, the people pleasing- conflict avoider does not trust stating their wants, needs, opinions, or beliefs is safe so they came across as this sweet, super nice person with friends, partners, co-workers, supervisors, even their medical practitioners….going to great lengths to be sure not to cause dissension! In reality, unless the other is also a people pleasing- never rocking the boat communicative partner this person will ignore an issue, avoid a conversation, and change the subject…all avoiding and most likely stuffing their feelings as they look into their proverbial internal mirror and see a reflection of Miss or Mr. nice person!

The bottom line is this person puts on a fake smile, negatively affects many interpersonal relationships, increases the risk of developing depression/anxiety/ other medical conditions..and results in a prevention of intimacy.

When a person becomes willing to stand up for themselves by stating their true feelings, and opinions about any subject, a shift happens. When that person takes a risk to be the same in almost all situations instead of playing roles in different settings, their throat chakra begins opening because of authentic communications , and the possibilities of deeper, intimate relationships can transform. It is really about making vulnerable connections in speaking our truth.

Personally, I enjoy nurturing relationships with people who show they are listening, who give me the opportunity to hear their truth, who align with similar values, and who are not afraid to agree equally with disagreeing on a variety of topics.

In my mind and in the vision I carry for a different world. disagreeing with another is a keystone to understanding another. When we each face our fears and speak what is in our hearts, we have a closer alliance with being unified. Just because we do not always agree with each other is not a justification for exiting a relationship. That being said, I will tell you those who repeatedly feel the need out of insecurity and apprehensions to not speak up and who are in fear of telling me how they really feel inside create questions in my mind of the value of the relationship, and I do weigh the pros and cons of staying or leaving. As with other awarenesses that come to the surface in our search for being the best version of ourselves, practice makes progress, but first has to come the admission of what is needing tweaking and recalibration.


Dare To Be The Best Version Of Yourself

Reflecting on my early childhood the moments I felt most alive were experiences and adventures embracing the great outdoors. I thrived climbing a pine tree not caring my Mother would not be happy with me that pine resin was stuck in my long, thick hair! As a curious child, I embraced and was filled with passion and the magical enchantment of the natural world. Then a few years of dysfunction entered my world. It took a while for me to reclaim myself , and reclaim I did!

I did not jumpstart my desire to become my best ME journey for any other reason than I felt this innate pull to find a way to become comfortable in my own skin . This has not been a quick transformation, and still is ongoing. Think of the huge change from a pupa to a butterfly and every single evolutionary step along the way. This was my destiny, and can be yours too ..if you are willing to dive off proverbial cliffs of unknown possibilities into deep canyons and oceans of self discovery to meet the you that you had no clue existed!

I offer some ideas. Vision the evolved you. Draw and write it on paper. Tell the kind of place you reside in detail. Describe your abilities, traits, and skills you own and offer to the world. Write affirmations in the present tense of specific activities you will be doing. For example, ” I am a person of physical, emotional, and spiritual strength by going to the gym and being of service daily to those who cross my path.”

Describe your friendships that supplement and resonate with your core values. Then , consider present people in your life that you are willing to walk away from with unconditional compassion because they demonstrate characteristics opposing your values. You don’t even have to have an inkling of a desire to change them or tell them why you need to create space between you. Furthermore, you probably do not have any emotional attachments to the friendships from which you desire to walk away. When we look at our inner truth of the level we value our connections with those we have allowed into our lives ( whether we have had a long or short history with them) as we practice self love for our core being, we will receive internal validation of needing to either set boundaries and/or decrease communications with them. Keep in mind everything is temporary, and perhaps just a pause for the present is needed. We may never want to completely burn bridges but taking an alternate route for ourselves in the moment often is an act of cherishing ourselves.

I personally am in the midst of a great transition of moving from a place that for four years has offered me isolated stillness of nature to a small, very cool town in which I can co-create community with new people. It all has flowed beautifully, and I believe daring to become a better version of myself is emerging . I feel I am a new species of lotus blossoming once again fueled by the waters of surrendering and shedding parts of my former self. I have jumped off similar proverbial cliffs before, usually with a bit of trepidation. This time I only feel excited as I unfurl my wings and fly into a place of contented joy.

There are still areas of my life needing refinement but as we all know, daring to be more of who we can be, just might prove we are miracles- in- the- making lasting until we leave this Earth- plane! I do hope you will join me on your own incredible journey of self discovery in meeting the best version of yourself. Safe travels!


Living In A Time Now With Opportunities of Transformation

I have walked through many opportunities in my life. Some of them took me a while to see each situation as blessings and opportunities for immense change. I remember when President John F. Kennedy died. I marched in protest of the Vietnam War. I cried at racial injustice throughout my lifetime. I stood with other women not as a “feminist” but as sister of peace. I stood with men as a supporter of courage, sensitivity, and balance. I have watched divisions and separation of people from each other based on skin color, beliefs, opinions, and other situations. As a child who actively lived through the Sixties, even in my youth and pre-teen years, I believed we were each equals and reflections of each other.

I am completely convinced we of Humanity are being given the greatest opportunity of all time to embrace Unity, to stand together as we uphold our Core Values. I do not have to prove you wrong to make myself right. My and your ancestors were people who stood tall in the face of adversity. Their strength and perseverance paved the way to show us each there is another way to co-exist with all living things.

I often refer to the pandemic that showed up in 2000 as the time when the world changed. I have no doubt we , for decades, have vocalized something needs to change. Energy flows where attention goes. Ancient cultures taught the wisdom of embracing the Natural World as a teacher and that the balance of the Sacred Feminine/Sacred Masculine within each of our inner selves was a catalyst to achieving the Peace Within each being seeks.

We got so absorbed in getting ahead, in being Number One cloaked in the patterns of “Self” that we began leaving behind what we sought …connections with each other. We became obsessed with our electronic devices, the ability to rant and rave on social media, and the accepted verbal diarrhea of condemning those whose ideas and opinions differed from our own.

As I see it, more and more public displays of the Great Wake Up Reset are beyond the proverbial tap on our Collective Shoulders . The push is strongly felt by all that it is indeed a time of transformative opportunities to first do our own inner work surrendering all that truly does not serve us, and then, to come together in harmonic peace IN SPITE OF OUR DIFFERENCES.

Allowing short and long term relationships of all kinds to either thrive or be released, nurturing our planet and all its inhabitants, and being willing to release the “I am right, you are wrong Syndrome” via the power of the only real element: the power of Love and Light will be the legacy we can choose….or will we continue as a species to fall further into the depths of darkness believing this is our destiny?

Yes, it is the time with opportunities. My ancestors showed me strength comes from honoring my Personal Power and making viable choices with the awareness fueled by actions based on my Core Values. If I am practicing being true to myself with self love and self compassion, it is highly likely I will be offering this same opportunity to you, to Nature, and to the planet. It is not too late for the Collective to become the best version of ourselves. The question is sandwiched in Willingness and Courage. Light and Love or Bitterness and Resentments? Fear or Love? Being Comfortable In Our Own Skins or Shaking In Fear as we did when Tyrannosaurus Rex was about to enjoy us for dinner? Seize the opportunity or bury our heads in the sand? Choices.


The Peace In Not Taking Things For Granted

I really want to want to believe I am a person who flows through life like a floating cloud detached from the material world. Then something happens such as the world changing in front of my surprised face giving me a golden opportunity to question if how I am living my life is the way I really want to live it!

Here is how the revelation came to me. First I began noticing products I have enjoyed using for decades were gone because companies who created them went out of business. Medical practitioners I had partnered with either shut down or re-located were no longer my option to enjoy. Disruptions in shipping having a direct impact on availability of merchandise I assumed was always there when I wanted it suddenly seemed to be in a state of lack. Then came the strangeness of not knowing if someone I passed on the street was smiling back at me because most of us were masked due to the COVID-19 Pandemic .

I conceded to the Universe that indeed my attention had been awakened to things I, Ms. Go With The Flow, had been taking for granted! I dove deeper. I see now yet another gift of how the world changed seemingly because of a virus was being shown to me. Actually this is just another layer of my proverbial onion that has continued to unpeel its layers since I became conscious of what is really true! I saw , and not with my initial reaction of jumping for joy, that those things (and people) I took for granted offered me yet another illusion…a false sense of security relating to permanence when in reality was not permanent or secure in the first place! The truth revealed is it was my emotional attachment to all I had been taking for granted!

So here came the question my committee who lives inside my head asked at one of our late night meetings: if I, the wise and powerful, knew nothing lasts forever, why oh why did I treat things, situations, and people as if they did?

Here came the positive news from this awareness. What if I made the intention and followed through in effortful grounding of the foundation of standing in the present moment? My inner Committee all shook their proverbial heads in affirming head nods of “Yes!”. In the Present moment I can see the value of relationships, things, and situations to a greater degree, and carry within myself the acceptance and solutions of change when change comes. After all, change is the only constant!

I am the first to admit living in the present is not easy. It is easier to create distractions that allow ourselves to wander aimlessly away from living in that place of specific things that matter the most. My great mind..really is responsible for most of my inner struggles and suffering and the Creator of that turmoil of the “What If Syndrome “. You know, what if I lose what I have or don’t get what I want!

I think I will return to being grateful for what and who is present in this moment, and minimizing taking for granted much of anything.


Following The Path Beckoning You

I am comfortable today knowing I march to the beat of my own drum. Even as a child I knew I viewed the world with a different perspective. Please know that I would never consider myself to be a feminist. However, growing up as an intuitive visionary in the Southern United States, I curiously observed males culturally assigned to accepted roles and females following along especially in the South using sweet, endearing phrases suggestive of sugar melting in mouths. Although at times timid in my youth I was never one to keep quiet and go along with the crowd. I suspect those who did even decades ago were inwardly seething and stuffing their feelings as they chose a path of what appeared to be of the least resistance of safe choices. I used to believe this was only characteristic of females until the year the world changed and I watched in absolute shock and even disbelief of how many people of both genders in all cultures instead of following a path that probably had always been calling them, continued on a straight line of stuck and perhaps unfulfilled lives. Furthermore, I read their social media posts and heard statements verbalized of shifts happening but still the majority looked to me to be stuck in the old paradigm. Truly actions speak much louder than words!! Yes I know change can be scary but when we think and act as we always have, our reality of manifestation experiences what we always have gotten.

My opinion as an active proverbial cliff jumper who has many times in adulthood left my comfort zone to follow the path that not only beckoned me but screamed loudly that if I ( and we )stayed in a box created and forced upon by the old paradigm we would either become physically, emotionally, or mentally sick and/or become loud , unhappy, stressed verbal proponents of we must do life differently as we watch the destruction of humanity crumbling in front of us. Maybe people have to get gut wrenching angry to realize the path they are so entrenched in wearing the same old shoes of cemented quicksand of thoughts and ideas as they pretend to enjoy self imposed prisons of daily inner illusions is not working .

If you feel I am being extremely or even slightly judgmental perhaps the buttons I am pushing are only because your true path has been louder than your buying into the need to stay safe. Are you really safe? Long ago I heard it is never too late to have a happy childhood. My new mantra based on years of marching to the beat of my own drum is It is never too late to have a happy adulthood! Don’t create a new box…throw that box concept away, and risk following the path that summons you. You just might find when you jump off your cliff of ”safety” you will amazingly discover you had wings of freedom tucked inside your shoulders all along.


The Importance of Being Transparent

There was a time in my adult life that I held back from certain people who I really was. I would present myself one way with certain friends and colleagues, and hide parts of myself from others. When I speak of transparency I am referring to being honest and open. Many people are wrapped up in a illusive sandwich of perfection and looking/sounding good, even to their closest allies. Most likely their apprehension to be transparent is cloaked in insecure fears and a lack of trusting themselves . As a result their personal power is squashed in a field of fearing to be vulnerable, and a deep seeded mistrust within themselves.

The day I stepped off my cliff of what I thought was protection, I became aware I had claimed wings of authenticity, and simultaneously made the decision to be the same in all settings. I began speaking from my heart, and did not need to hide any aspects of myself as I once had believed were necessary.

As I am reflecting on how freeing being transparent really is, I am aware of a few people in my life who are still intimidated by this. Though it seems that they judge various aspects of my life that I freely share, it is really their self judgment they are projecting onto me. I am an intuitive people observer and I often view these people making ostentatious statements of what they know about the world, and even voicing facts they believe about me! I am aware this trait is only their self protection of their insecurities and lack of self trust. Knowing this is really what is going on within them prevents me from disliking or judging their actions. I only am aware of this because before I was transparent this is exactly how I behaved in the world!

As a transparent woman I am empowered to be my best advocate of personal truths and as a result I continually attract connections with people who not only trust me, but also value me. Not sure if it is the chicken-egg story of what came first…did I trust and risk myself to be vulnerable and transparent first or did I first attract people who were showing me being transparent and claiming core values in almost all areas of their lives was a message of being authentically real ? Most of my current tribe of close friends are those who do trust themselves, are transparent and vulnerable, and truly exude their authenticity. At times I am challenged by those who choose not to be this way, but believe in my heart perhaps they , too, one day will jump off their own proverbial cliff of what they perceive to be self protection, and become vulnerable, and maybe not be wound so tightly.

Long ago I learned to ask myself questions and these three questions really increase and validate my choice in being transparent :

  1. Is how I share and respond with people honoring who I have become?
  2. Does being vulnerable prevent me from trying to be a people pleaser?
  3. Does sharing the honest truth of who I am make me feel comfortable in my own skin?

Unearthing the hole of needing to hide was like finding a buried treasure and opened to me the truth that transparency is important and part of the me I always wanted to be but did not know where to start.


Claiming Peace In A Chaotic World

In the midst of global upheaval cloaked in suffering and chaos the Collective Consciousness is wrapped in fearful anticipations of what may be our future. Since mid 2020 I have watched as those in spiritual communities spouting their way is THE way, those in challenging medical situations, conspiracy believers, those who have lost hope, as well as visionaries who hold steadfast to the inner wisdom we of Humanity are experiencing the Great Re-Set. Intense emotions of hate, anger, fear, frustration, powerlessness, confusion, and sadness seem to block so many from a feeling of safety and inner serenity. How can we each resolve our struggle with finding inner peace?

Trust me when I tell you I am not blind to what is going on in the external world. However, having walked through a series of life altering situations that I was sure would not end in my own survival, I am a witness that claiming and owning inner peace is not only possible but is attainable for each of us. That being said, if we do what we have always done, we will get what we have always gotten.

I have come to believe that peace begins with the L word..no, not lust, longing, or light. What I believe is , it is about love. The greater emphasis and actions I take in getting out of my head recycling my feelings and the Woe is Me Syndrome, and putting my focus on sharing unconditional compassion and love with others, the more it is possible to claim and experience peace. This is not easy, but when we make an intentional choice to surrender our fear and anger and allow what we think we understand to unfold in the present, we just might be amazed at how our internal world changes.

Practice makes progress has been my mantra for many years. Since I am still a human at times I forget what works so I take the time when in a place of peace to write on sticky notes and on paper my solutions.

1. Believing peace is my birthright, I can claim it in any moment. I say aloud..I claim peace. I have this phrase on notes I stick on the wall, in my car, and on my desk.

2. State and write those things I currently have in my life for which I can express gratitude.

3. Spend time alone with nature.

4. Accept what is , especially those things and people I have no control over.

5. Transmute and change my addictions into preferences. An addiction is any desire that results in my lack of contentment if and when it is not satisfied. Example: if I get emotionally bent out of shape when I expect someone to change a behavior and they don’t, then my addiction is to control and have others bow down and go along with my request and wishes.

6. Make effective use of willpower to choose positive thoughts, and when negative ones pop in, pause.. switch to those mental thoughts that bring me serenity and peace.

7. Be selective with the people , social media, and news you allow to filter into your mind and life. Practice saying No. Verbalize: I do not choose this at this moment.

8. Offer help to another or to an animal without expecting to receive anything back as a compensation. In other words, be of service.

You may discover by practicing some simple techniques that you have more control over your amazing self than you have previously thought, and why not, once you see what works, tell your solution to another!


Nature Is Waiting To Teach Us But Are We Listening?

I think I knew from my earliest childhood memory that nature was available to me for internal calming. No matter how many times old insecurities pop up when I am making every effort to do adulting as a together child of the sixties, it never fails to amaze me that the misplaced key to unlock my frustrations is walking through that magical portal of Nature and the Natural World!

My arrogant ego mind will try to convince me that I can figure out some brilliant strategy to step off the insecurity treadmill of not being good enough, not making the right decisions and choices, or looking in a mirror and seeing a flawed, distorted body image instead of the beautiful goddess reflecting back to me. Incredibly , I can escape my old tapes , my false beliefs and connect with nature, and come back home to discover I have been transformed into a lovely being comfortable in her own skin once again!

Nature , I know, is the greatest teacher in existence! She offers the ability to be at peace even during a ravishing storm. She demonstrates repeatedly how to be comfortable with herself as she is. She voices she does not have to be in a rush to evolve and change yet reaches her accomplished goals. She helps us remember beauty and incredible visual images do not have a price tag . She grants peace in the presence of all our real and imagined troubles with unconditional love, without asking for something in return. She proves again and again size does not determine greatness as she shows an airborne floating dandelion floret or the magnified expression of a snowflake.

The next time you look at the changed world as out of control and unfair, try walking away from your electronic devices and step into the magical world of nature and watch your problems melt into glorious transitions of the beauty that only nature has a way of transforming your angst into awe.

Nature is always waiting on human interactions and it pleases her so when we actually take the time to listen and experience freedom of internal joy. Are we listening?


Stop Looking Outside Of Yourself For Your Security

Have you ever been doing your practices and activities that work to keep you in balance only out of the blue those inner demons jump out with pitchfork in hand, poking holes in your happiness? I truly believe in these times, and I can be just as guilty as the rest of you, that I have bought into the illusion and deception that my self worth, my inner security, my being comfortable in my own skin is to be found by going to people/situations/things outside of myself! There I go searching everywhere for bread crumbs of validation, love, and contentment just so I can feel I matter, I am good enough, and I am amazing! That old tape has once again whispered to me that attention from a current or potential romantic partner, spending money on some piece of art, getting 15 likes on my social media post, or my co workers or friend telling me how special I am will be the key of my missing link to fulfill those times of feeling less than, rejected, or inferior.

Way back in my precious childhood I depended on my caregivers and others and any sense of rejection or invalidation felt like the fatal stabbing of my vulnerable heart. Because many of us were repeatedly hurt, rejected, and insecure (because we did not have the handbook to be powerful warriors yet) we carried feelings of shame and guilt into adulthood with skewed perceptions of who we really were. I am not here to blame any of those in authority roles for I truly believe they each did the best they could in raising us. They did not have the handbook either! However, until we find solutions to embrace our emotional wounds and claim compassion for ourselves, we often run around seeking approval and validation from especially others. When we carry this insecure need like a sack of rocks dragging behind us and heavily on our shoulders, we search outside of ourselves for the answers. The downside to believing others can fulfill us and make us feel good about who we are is we are allowing them to determine our self worth. The consequence is we do not trust our own opinions, thoughts, and feelings . We claim in our internal sanctum others have our answers and know more then we do and their ideas are more meaningful than our own. Over repeated periods of time of carrying around this false truth, we present as needy and beg for validation outside of ourselves crying for THEM to announce we are okay!! The magical answer, however, my friends, is we each have within us the power to validate ourselves! There are times we do remember this, and we walk through our journey in this thing called life, feeling proud, contented, and inspired of the Who we have involved into and become.

Perhaps if we knew some things that will pull us out of the hole we have dug and climbed into we would experience less the need to go outside of ourselves for our self approval and self validation. We could:

  • Accept our emotions and feelings without judgement as each comes up.
  • Remember our feelings are not who we are. Feelings come and go and are always temporary. Breathe-accept and acknowledge feelings-exhale- move forward.
  • Affirm your authentic true self with statements such as: I am worthy. I am much more than my accomplished performed acts and my experienced failures or setbacks. I trust my inner wise person within as my intuition gives me insightful messages. I do not have to like everyone and everyone does not have to like me. We each do and will make mistakes that we can see as opportunities from which to grow.
  • Change your inner self talk to words and expressed communications as if you were talking to a close friend. What would you tell him/her in a similar situation?

Each time we practice giving ourself validation, self love, compassion, and acknowledging our own worth it is yet another insurance marker in lifting ourselves up and helping to need less going outside of ourselves to find our personal truth. I believe with all my heart and soul we each are so worthy and amazing. We just forgot to remember! We could even go a step further and remind one another of this !


The Nurturing of Nature

Most of us enjoy spending time in nature whether it is hiking, running, walking, or driving through scenic vistas. The pleasure of experiencing a deep canyon, a forest cascaded by radiant light showering through trees, a snow-covered mountain, a park shared with mischievous squirrels and symphonic birds, or the inviting flowing rhythms of an ocean or river. We walk along enjoying the surroundings, but how often do we actually feel the connection to each element of nature? This opportunity presented to us each and every time we allow ourselves to break free from our electronics , our to do lists, our multitudes of mental chatter by allowing the creative alliance with nature to touch us in a deep way offers an inner sanctuary unlike any other aspect of life!

If you have never had the experience to become aware while in nature as you gaze upon a rock, a plant, a tree, or a mound of earth to be overtaken with reflective thoughts that you are not unlike these simple and beautiful pieces of nature , I urge you to view nature in a different manner. When we have what seems sudden and awe striking revelations of our existence being no different than that which we observe with all our senses in the stillness of nature, we become nurtured by nature. Being nurtured by nature in this way , in my experience , has opened a new and exciting world …a world in which birds, deer, butterflies don’t see me as an invader of their environment , but an actual part of it. When this magic happens the creatures of the natural world brush against my skin, connect with me as I connect with them!

If you are willing to step out of your busy life , I would like to suggest some simple new ways to connect with nature :

*Change your thinking and you change your reality and manifestation of experiences. Nature is not just something separate from your environment..it is part of you as much as you are part of it. One tiny example is the oxygen you breathe 24/7 is an equal relationship of life force between humans and trees creating a crucial facet for each other to thrive and live. Begin thinking of how we each are nature herself, and she is us! Go into your chosen place in nature alone. When we are with others in nature we tend to talk to each other; thus, depriving ourselves of the opportunity to connect fully with the nature with which we are present.

* Use your instinctive observational skills you were born with…vision-hearing-touching-smelling, moving your body. Look around you with childlike wonder. I believe this simple method will awaken the deep aspects within and you will know nature in a different way.

*Choose a place to sit with your back against a tree or a large rock. Breathe in the quietude. Just observe. Express your gratitude to nature for this precious time.

Allowing nature to nurture us will add layers of calmness, reduce our anxiety and stress, and inspire us to do it more often!


Setting Intentions For New Year

Long ago I became aware that making New Year’s resolutions restricted my free spirit within! Intentions keep me focused and empower me to act upon them . Even with my best intentions I have found myself distracted unless I can find ways to maintain my focus. I do use many things that help. I always create a Vision Board in which I draw symbols, words, phrases, and objects with various colored pens, markers, pastels what I desire to surrender (on full moons) and set intentions I wish to manifest (on New Moons). I never make my boards by cutting out pictures from magazines. I find drawing images accesses a different part of my active brain power and works better for me! Vision Boards need to be kept simple…if we put too much on one board our brain sees cluttered ideas and the focus or intent is much like chatter boxing ! I keep my created Vision Board where I will see it frequently and daily..in this way my brain receives the intended information and can actively create specific actions bringing intentions into fruition.

Sometime back I heard about picking a word of the year as a better substitute for resolutions. I tried it and fell in love with the idea! Now every year I pick my signature Word of the Year. Here is how I do it…Between around Christmas and the first of the year I go into my Quietude space and reflect upon the expanded Me I want to become more of for the year. I write many words that come up that will characterize who I want to see as my authentic self by the end of the year. This is not about accomplishing anything..rather it is more about how I would like to evolve to be a better version of myself.

If none of the words on my word list seem to resonate within myself, I do not put pressure that I must have the perfect word! I leave it alone and come back to it in a few days or even a week later.

Once I have my word of the year, I put it on a vision board, write it on sticky notes, put it on the outside of my current journal and my dream journal book. I write my word frequently, repeating it . This word of the year becomes a single word mantra! It serves to ground me into a calm focus and reminds my brain who I truly want to become in the manifestation of my amazing life!

In case you are at a loss for your own word of the year, here are some examples: Resilient, Health, Abundance, Humble, Gratitude, Strength, Joy, Forgiving, Listening, Creative. There are thousands of choices!

My word for 2022 is HOPE. Intentions instead of goals or resolutions work so much better. As evidence I have experienced opportunities and manifested areas of my health, relationships, career, fun, and travel! To know if something works I look at the outcome. Does it bring me closer to being the best version of myself or does it take me further from it?



Before we jump headfirst into the New Year, perhaps we may take some precious time to reflect upon the year we have just experienced. I honor the wisdom and teachings of those Ancient Civilizations that existed in history. Perhaps you , like I, are considering taking some of the areas of past history into your own evolutionary and revolutionary lives. Many of the great civilizations utilized technologies and techniques equal and surpassing our own. The incredible structures of pyramids, temples, and geometric designs tapped into knowledge of quantum physics that we are really just at a core beginning to integrate within our routine systems.

Even with the advanced systems and information in place ancient civilizations fell apart. There clearly were reasons for the crumbling and demise of magnificent cultures and civilizations. Primarily, greed-the obsessive need to exert Power over others-out of control egos- and divisions of the populations including sacred feminine and sacred masculine aspects, ethnicities, gender, race, and other aspects.

Perhaps, you may want to reflect upon the year and your personal experiences . In what specific ways have you demonstrated greed, obsessions to exert personal power, listening and following your ego’s suggestions, and areas you have aligned with separating yourself from other groups of people? Where did you practice more effective ways of living your life? Did you embrace nature more? Did you welcome the opportunity of stillness and quietude when changes of the world continued? How have your interpersonal relationships changed and evolved? Did you willingly or begrudgingly allow those relationships no longer aligning with your Highest Good drop ? How have your communications with yourself and with others been altered? In what ways did you express your creativity or did you resist creative activities ? Did you accomplish your set intentions or did you put various things on hold? How has your life changed ?

I personally carry an opinion for myself that if I am willing to reflect upon where I have been in my life journey and choose to learn from it without beating myself with a proverbial 2×4 , but honoring each step along the way , I can become a better version of myself.

Leonardo da Vinci said : “I love those who can smile in trouble, who can gather strength from distress, and grow brave by reflection.” When we can choose to reflect upon what worked, what did not work, and how we can creatively design a flexible (not rigid) intention of prosperity of all areas in our lives, I do believe the outcome can be brighter and more fulfilling. I welcome with hope the best me and the best you we can be so our collective vision of the best new world, not a return to the way it was, can manifest right before our very wide, curious eyes!!


Looking For Ideal Partner? : Start With YOU

So many of us think that our ideal mate is out there somewhere…if we could only find him/her. We do dating sites, meet up groups, social media, even re-visit former relationships! We think somehow, some way we will find that perfect someone who will be the Prince to our inner Cinderella ! We walk around cloaked in our illusion that the missing pieces, the unfulfilled parts of ourselves, and the answer to our yearnings will be magically manifested in Prince or Princess Charming. The truth is until we cultivate an intimate relationship with ourself, we will miss that connection we so crave. A lonely person who enters a relationship is a lonely person in a relationship. A person denying intimacy with themselves will not have an intimate relationship with another. You may think intimacy is having sex. No. True intimacy has these juicy components: vulnerability- trust-honesty-acceptance-validation. Before delving further, ask yourself do you trust yourself to make good decisions? Do you accept and love the good- bad- beautiful-ugly- the shadow and light sides of yourself? Do you validate yourself on a regular basis? Are you honest about who you really are in those quiet moments when alone and not distracted? Can you be vulnerable with yourself by expressing and exposing your feelings, saying what you want or need, being present without needing to distract yourself? These reflective questions will provide starting points for inner work.

When we know who we really are , we are comfortable in our own skin. When that happens we can be intimate with just about anyone. We do not need to find someone to fix our broken pieces because we are not broken! We do not need to find a broken counter person because they are not broken either! It is never about THEM anyway…it is about our self love, self honoring, self validation, and having a love affair with the guy or chick we see looking back at us in the mirror. After all, every relationship is just a reflection of who we are.

Where to begin————commitment and intention to do inner work

  1. Take a deep breath. Look in a mirror straight into your eyes. Introduce yourself to you. 2. Begin listening to yourself..your self talk, your feelings, etc. Do this over time, and it becomes a practice. 3. Take responsibility for your choices. This is major! Start by making a choice to be happy instead of needing to be right! 4.Start practicing those things that feed your soul, that make you feel good. You might want to write out those things. This is Self-care! 5. Put pauses throughout your day every day. This free time with yourself offers times to check in, to connect, to find gratitude and peaceful, happy occurrences. Remember the phrase Stop and smell the coffee? 6. Surrender the inner critic within. Life is not meant to be a race or a test. 7. Do things that give you PLEASURE: physical, emotional, spiritual, mental. 8. Be gentle with yourself. This inner work takes time, but it is so worth it!

Self intimacy is a gateway, a portal to harmonious, safe, and fulfilling relationships with others. Imagine a world of people so comfortable in skins that they actually enjoy each other’s company!

This idea came to me in a reflective meditation once. Feel free to borrow it. “When I allow you and myself to be who we each need to be in the present moment, I have no need to judge you or want to change you to fit my preconceived agenda.It really is about love and more love!


Honoring Ourselves By Creating Our Unique Holiday Traditions

     It is my heartfelt belief we each deserve to celebrate this time of year in the way that reflects who we are in the present. That means celebrating, choosing to be alone, celebrating with family or friends, celebrating with spiritual groups, or not celebrating.
     Being a creative spirit who marches to the beat of her own drum, several years ago it occurred to me that my true self did not require the past holiday traditions of my culture or family of origin. I decided it would be a self loving act to create my own unique holiday traditions. To determine what would work for me, I asked myself some questions.
– Were there any childhood holiday traditions memories that stood out as happy thoughts?
– What did I want to include in my new traditions?
– Did I want to include others or just include myself?
     It became crystal clear I no longer chose to be trapped emotionally in the stigma of the holiday traditions of others. After all, I do not live my current life based on the way others live theirs, so why would I choose to experience the holiday season with the traditions of anyone else? Of course, if I wanted to do what others were doing, that would be appropriate, too!
     So, here is what I created:
     1. Because I am so connected to nature, I went into the woods and requested the elementals and nature beings  to help me honor them. I was gifted with pine boughs and pine cones, holly and red berries, and a small log. I added candles around these treasures, creating an holiday altar on my hearth.
    2. Each morning during December I dedicate time, compassion, and food to the animals I co-exist with in my wooded residence.
    3. Each night I made a commitment to sit in front of the fireplace and write in my journal , honoring the Fire Element, by expressing the things and ideas that ignite me that I am passionate about. I also offered thanks to each aspect of what/who is present in my life , gathered all that love into my heart, and sent it out into the world to all beings.
    4. Lastly, I made a decision to take  myself to a Winter Solstice Celebration with like hearted people.
     Reclaiming our holiday by creating our original, unique traditions and rituals  can be a loving way to avoid stress of old memories that do not muster peace, and is a gift to both our inner children and adult presence.



The Importance of Listening And Cooperating With Our Inner Messages

For a few years I have known in my heart and mind that we hold all our own answers within. We receive continuous messages from our intuition, our cells, our organs, every part of us. The Ancient Ones in past civilizations and cultures knew this crucial fact, and taught this sacred knowledge to all. We have often forgotten.

I consider myself healthy in my diet, my exercise regiment, and my daily spiritual practices. Recently I became quite ill and could not tolerate much of anything solid in the form of food. I am a Reiki Master, Sound Healing Practitioner, Daily Meditator, and practice Ancient Shamanic modalities. Of course I offered my body,mind, and spirit my own practices and reached out to other healing facilitators I have trust in. I also received unsolicited  and unhelpful advice and suggestions as to why I was sick.

I incorporate and welcome Western Medicine with Alternative  Medicine . My illness began two months ago and gradually progressed in a downward spiral. I went to my Integrative Medicine Doctor who suggested diagnostic tests, and , as always, he honored the fact I listen to my own body and intuition.

My body was telling me it was my time to come to a resting place, to receive instead of my usual M.O. of giving  help to others and holding Sacred Space for the Collective in our time of world chaos. As if I had a choice, and it became clear I did not, I stopped my activities. My body became weaker each day. I lived for close to a month on green juice, water, and broth. I did have a C-T scan, bloodwork, and an endoscopy. Most of the tests showed nothing was wrong with me. I listened without judgement but was weak. My body slept 10-11 hours a night. I experienced incredible Dreamtime each night, and even slept and dreamed during the day. I did finally receive a medical diagnosis of an abdominal, curable condition.

Through this experience I was not afraid, but at times was frustrated ; however, I continued listening to my dreams, my inner messages, and welcomed the support of my large tribe of friends and loved ones.

The messages of the Ancient Ones kept telling me to honor the change from Summer into Autumn, to be like the Wise trees that serve as my protection and guardians on the incredible property on which I live. I felt, just like the strong oaks, willows, and pines I was shifting in my beliefs, perceptions, and energies. When we allow ourselves to let go of trying to figure out logically what has no logical answers, and to trust the  Ancient Teachings ,Wisdom of Nature ,and Natural Laws to unfold, incredible events come to pass. Our world has changed and those who try to use prior ways to work through current situations just may discover those ways are now archaic, and no longer valid. Using the old ways will bring more fear, more anger, and more frustration. We must be willing to embrace a new paradigm if we are to live in peace and harmony today.

As I recently have begun able to eat food again, and returned to a gentle yoga practice, I see the necessity of this illness. I wonder maybe sometime img_3852 I asked for clarity, for inner answers to questions I did not consciously know to ask. I am grateful for the sickness that brought me to a screeching halt for it came with great gifts and blessings of surrender, of detoxification, of deeper trust and faith. I did release a couple of people I thought were supportive friends  during the short illness when I discovered they really were not supportive at all. My vibrational level has changed…theirs had stayed back in the past. I do not judge their path. Those relationships, too, have been part of my Autumn clearing and awakening.

Each experience I am blessed to witness continues to be an opportunity, a catalyst of ascension toward a new world, for we who have awakened, and to those gradually joining us. Sometimes we just have to stop and let natural cleansing lift us out of our old skins, and into a new sense of wonder. It does require mustering courage to be vulnerable enough to be transformed into a better version of ourselves. I often do not see the Warrior I was born to be for the purpose of sharing my experiences.. to lead another soul out of their own shadows..until I finally find the hidden doorknobs and walk into a brighter light. We are in this together, my friends. Let’s not give up just yet.


Aligning With Ourselves Creates Clarity On All Levels

How do we know we are out of alignment with our inner self? A big clue is when we are indecisive. We may keep researching online, keep asking different people for their opinion concerning our situation, but we still feel like a hamster chasing its tail running on a wheel, getting nowhere , staying stuck in a maize of indecision. Inwardly we really know what choice to make…yet, we allow yourself to become a sandwich of fear..fear of the intuitive wisdom that our life is about to experience a huge change. Aligning with ourself will provide the keystone that more information will never provide. The keystone is to trust our intuition and follow through with what we keep hearing is the right action to take.

Don’t get me wrong. Looking and searching for meaningful answers and attempting to improve ourselves is a good thing. However, sometimes we cannot see the forest for the trees and we look everywhere for the solution…everywhere except what is right in front of our faces. We are like the cat running from its predator, hightailing it up a tree going to higher branches to avoid being caught. Just when we feel safe from our predator, the tree shape shifts into another object and the chase becomes even more challenging. Perhaps all we had to do was to stop and ask of ourself: What is our real motive in running and thinking we need to be a better person than we already are?

Perhaps we are carrying around a version of what we think we are supposed to look like to prove we are a success in relationships, in our career, in our community, and in our choices. Are we spending energy and time visualizing a picture of manifesting some version of ourselves that isn’t even who we are or who we want to become? Have we considered if we are somehow able to pull this off and achieve the outcome we are so frantically chasing will we be at peace and be willing to stop and enjoy ourselves? Will we ever reach a place that we are enough as we are or will there always be another mountain to climb?

What if we each knew that by aligning with ourselves we would discover the magic elixir of clear thinking, easy and reachable decision-based goals, and avoiding the stress of creating more to do lists to show we have arrived successfully in life?

I have a strong feeling life does not have to be as complicated as human doings trying to become human beings make it. Some ideas that I have found work :

  • Surrender from a place of love, not a place of fear and force. Trusting the Universe has our back and is not testing us, but is supporting us. When we let go, we can breathe freely and the inner truth of who we really are is revealed. We no longer have to become someone we think others want us to be . We can relax in living a magical life of being just who we are….embracing the things we truly are passionate about, and skipping down the Yellow Brick Road of contentment .
  • When we let things flow, no matter what comes up, we release the need and belief our lives have to constantly struggle. We do not even need to know how things are going to unfold and evolve. In other words, we do not have to be controlling our outcomes.
  • If you were given the magic wand of creation, who would you be? How would you spend each day and night? What kinds of people would you spend time with? How would people view you and talk with you when you transformed into the best version of yourself? Ask yourself right now which is the ideal path to embark upon that will open the door to your shining , wonderful self to not only the rest of the world but also to yourself? This is simple but we may try to complicate it ..can you imagine living a magical life 24/7? Use that magic wand and align with your true self.
  • The point is not to want to be better. Take action and act on that deep, age old desire to shift into the person you have been hoping and dreaming of becoming. When we step out of our old skin and cocoon into the amazing person that we already are, we are aligned with ourself…the self that was always within us, and who we really are and always have been. Who we are is The Who we have allowed and given permission to our attention to focus upon. Where is your attention right now? Mine is on that radiating light pouring out of my heart and soul. We have the power to choose. What is your choice?