We, travelers, as spirits in human suits, know our connections with others have the potential to reduce stress ,live longer and happier lives, and increase our self confidence. However, even though we claim this truth, we often carry beliefs and self-sabotaging, self-defeating patterns blocking the vulnerability and intimacy necessary for the connection experiences we crave!
Our resistance in allowing others, and ourselves, to see who we really are is often the underlying source of broken, unfulfilled connections with others.
I can think of a few friends—-or now I call them acquaintances….who stated they were just too busy to connect with me. Each of these people I have known for 10+ years. I have changed..it’s true. I have evolved into a person who says what she needs and wants in relationships, states and exposes my real feelings, communicates what I think, and even listens in the present to others. I am not telling you about who I have become and transformed into so you will stroke my ego or glorify me. I want to share two aspects of the change within me that I take to the outer edges of the social world.
First, the friends I now see as acquaintances seemed unable or unwilling to connect with the vulnerable, intimate version, a more authentic version of myself. Perhaps, they each could not relate or interact anymore but did not have the ability to communicate this. I did not exactly end these relationships but I definitely backed off and minimized significantly my energy and time I previously freely gave to these old connections.
Secondly, by being and living as vulnerably as I can in the moment, new and more intimately alive relationships have walked into my circle of connections.
The key, I believe, in having more loving, authentic interpersonal connections is to embrace and maintain vulnerability. By doing this we each are able to recognize not only our value, but also increase the presence of our warrior within as we reveal who we really are. This fact can only strengthen our connections with each other.
I warn you…..this is an act of mustering COURAGE! Are you ready for deeper connections? I know some of you already are on an equal path for we have vibrated to each other. The rest of you are free to start the new journey when you feel ready.